Friendship Before Function

One of the core values Michelle and I have carried throughout our years in ministry—something we learned through NCMI—is this: Friendship comes before, during, and after function.

Too often in church life, relationships are built around what people do instead of who they are. You serve alongside someone for a season, and when the role changes, the relationship fades. But that’s not how it should work. Real friendship should outlast the task. We've tried to live that way and encourage others to do the same.

We’ve seen the same pattern in translocal ministry. Sometimes a church leader will invite someone to preach based purely on their gifting, without knowing the person at all. That’s risky. You don’t know what—or who—you’re bringing into the church. Bob Mumford once said, “If you have measles but say you have mumps, you can’t pass on mumps. You’ll pass on what you actually have.” In ministry, people impart who they are, not just what they say. That’s why trust and relationship matter so much.

Ministry built on friendship flows deeper. When you know each other’s hearts, there’s unity. There’s clarity. There’s fruit.

That’s what opened the door for us to minister in France this past month. Friends we’ve walked with through NCMI made the connection for us, and it led us to Église La Cité (The City Church).

Michelle and I were invited by Fred and Vanessa, who lead the church. From the beginning, it was clear that they are a couple who love their people and are serious about building the Kingdom. It was a joy to minister alongside them and begin developing relationship. We’re genuinely looking forward to getting to know them more and growing in friendship as we walk together. There’s already a strong sense of shared heart and purpose.

We’re thankful to Fred and Vanessa for their warm welcome and trust. Our desire is never just to preach a message and move on—we want to walk with people, build real partnership, and see the Kingdom advance together.

We’ve seen it again and again: when friendship comes first, function follows. That’s where the fruit is—and that’s how we want to keep building.We encourage others—whether leading, serving, or simply being part of a local church—to let friendship be the foundation. Function is important; we all have different roles the Lord gives us. But relationship comes first. It is, after all, the family of God—not the business of God.